It's nearing the 1am mark on a Friday night/Saturday morning. Three years ago, I'd still be out. Tonight, I'm home, just finished putting away groceries, blogging about the insanity that has become my life. Where once insanity was about the bars, dancing, and bands... it's now become the food fights, destruction, and silly things that come from itty bitty mouths of babes.
I was greeted this morning by a naked little fellow in bed. While this may have at once been a very shocking but exciting thing--today, not so much. That naked little fellow was the infamous Kaeden and he'd ripped everything, including his diaper off... thrown it onto the floor, and proceeded to redecorate with urine, all over his room. "Surprise Mommy!" is what I believe his Kaeden-ese said as I groaned for the first time today--at 7:30, am. (but, for the record, he did repeate "I get naked" when I asked why he was naked. So sweet.)
Joel decided that Olive Garden wasn't exciting enough at lunch time. ...they must not have gotten the memo about the circus show we brought to town cause they sure didn't seem very amused with the plate throwing and food flying. Tough crowd, yet again.
We did discover the McDonald's playland today. The breath of fresh greased up air that hit my lungs was enough to let me sing from the mountain tops "Hallelujia!!" because those little ankle biters of mine escaped into happy glee that didn't result in destruction, danger, or a mess for nearly an hour. Now, when we discovered we'd lost Kaeden somewhere in a tube lined tree there was a bit of the natural chaos that seems to come so very naturally anymore--but we did eventually find a character that seemed to fit the bill.
In addition to all that, we enjoyed time at the park, with snow coming down at about 8pm tonight. Yes, yes, I'm aware that 8pm is the boys bedtime, but hey, when a snow covered park comes calling it's hard to say no. Just ask them. And, Mommy enjoyed screaming "I'm gonna get you!!" and chasing after them. ...my version of hysterical torture (not to be confused with theirs, which usually results in a very large clean up in aisle whatever). Note to self: don't chase Kaeden and his itty bitty legs while he's not watching for divot's in the mulch. Well, not without his super-baby cape cause when he goes flying, he REALLY goes flying. (and that divot was right next to the slide so, picture whoosh, dink, and the baby is back up and running while mommy's furreaaaking out).
Now, yesterday...
Yesterday was one of those "why did I want children again" kind of days. After a shortened night of sleep and a lot of activity we ditched the idea of naptime to enjoy lunch with the boys grandma. I decided it might be fun to go to a hibachi grill restaurant. The boys thought it was fun to try to scare the fish that the restaurant housed. (hopefully there were no fish harmed in the housing of our children in said restaurant). When the grill started up, the boys were scared straight... as they clung on for safety seeing fire shooting off the grill. My thoughts? Dear Lord why was I thinking this was a good idea, they're going to be three and turn into pyromaniacs!
I digress.
Lunch actually went fairly well. We had one plate fly, a juice cup spill (thrown) and shatter, and two fairly quiet toddlers. I'd give them a 6. Yup, even with the broken dishes and food splatters.
Later in the day we went to a baby store to introduce a newly pregnant mommy friend of mine into the ever-loving-necessities of having a baby. (now, how did they do this whole child rearing in the olden days without the bumbo, exersaucer, formula seperators, and moby wraps?) Joel didn't get enough sleep, nap wise, and had an all out fit in the store. He was so bad he vomitted all over him and myself. Yup--you're grossed out now, just wait--it's gonna get worse. My poor friend tried to help and I demanded she just walk back, away. ...by the end of our shopping trip after trying animal crackers, new sippy cups, juice, m&m's, and fruit pouches Joel had surely convinced her that all she needed for this child was an abortion--because if they were all as bad as Joel, God save the world.
Then we went to dinner. Walking in, I thought... I've got the perfect plan (laugh now, seriously). I'll send her to get her food while I change the boys diapers, and then I'll leave them with her while I order for us. Great. No fighting with them to stand still, and peace for the thirty seconds it takes to order. Score! What I hadn't considered in that was who was going to assist in supervising while I was changing diapers. Doesn't sound like a big deal but toddlers who are banned from bathrooms, allowed to run lose in a one stall private bathroom--DANGER!! By the time I finished the first diaper Joel had managed to empty the female hygiene recepticle into the toilet. (as I said, gross). Note to self: add plastic gloves to the diaper bag, and be thankful that I was smart enough to put hand sanitizer in.
So... that's the end of my week in a nutshell (toiletbowl?).
And, amazingly enough... I love those little monsters with more than my whole being and wouldn't trade the insanity of my life for a moment. (but then again, remember it's 1:30am and I definately am lacking sleep).
"tada!"
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